Happiness-Faith-Hope: Stuck in a Dress & Random Photos

Ah, hon, I hate to tell you, but he has passed on . . .

Okay, so I'm fashionably challenged.

And he said unto them, Take heed, and beware of covetousness: for a man's life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth. Luke 12:15
Benedicto:

May your trails be crooked,
winding, lonesome,
dangerous, leading to the most amazing view.
May your rivers flow without end,
meandering through pastoral valleys
tinkling with bells,
past temples, and castles and poets' towers
into a dark primeval forest where tigers
belch and monkeys howl,
through miasmal and mysterious swamps
and down into a desert of red rock,
blue mesas, domes and pinnacles and
grottos of endless stone,
and down again into a deep vast ancient
unknown chasm
where bars of sunlight blaze on profiled
cliffs,
where deer walk across the white sand
beaches,
where storms come and go
as lightning clangs upon the high crags,
where something strange and more beautiful
and more full of wonder than your deepest
dreams
waits for you--
beyond the next turning of the canyon walls.
--Edward Abbey

Well, after that thought, I suppose I should be happy for my little trials in life that take me to other more lovely adventures.

One of those "adventures" happened yesterday. It was difficult. I hate shopping, but it is a necessary evil. When there is a huge sale that I must not pass up, due to my needing to be a resourceful money saver, I am forced to do a marathon clothes or shoe finding expedition. This usually only happens once or twice a year at the end of winter and summer season.

The reason for this forced expedition: The same clothes worn for two years and no basic black dress shoes. My most comfortable and favorite dress shoes were finally donated to the bin when we left our mission in England. Those stalwart puppies had served me well for approximately eight years (through two missions, before and in between). The only reason they died is the straps that held them on had no hole to hold the buckle anymore. Because my feet are so narrow, I usually do need straps to hold them on and it is hard to find shoes that don't hurt my arthritic big toe that was operated on years ago.

This season, flats are waaaaay in. They are so cute. None come in narrow enough sizes to keep on my feet. Besides, they offer no support--ouch when walking a lot.

After almost a hundred try ons, drooling over darling flats and really high heels like I used to be able to wear, I may have a pair of shoes. I took the other pair back (that I'd found the day before) because when I got home and put on nylons, they fell off my feet. I went back with nylons on this time so thick socks wouldn't disguise their staying on power.

After the shoes, I tried on some clothing and shimmied into a dress quite nicely only to find I couldn't get it off! It had no zipper or buttons, and a tight top, so it had to go off over the head. No way could it be slid over the hips and to the floor. I refused to call the sales person to help me out of it--how embarrassing would that be? She'd see all the weight I gained in England with the gravy problem. She'd see lots of things I'd prefer not to go public.

One reason getting out of that dress was so difficult is, I'm now considered elderly. Yes, the idiot media keeps reporting anyone above 50 as "elderly" when an incident happens, I could see the headlines: "Elderly Woman Freed With Jaws of Life." The other reason is, because I am apparently so elderly that my arms don't work well without a lot of pain if moved at certain angles while pulling or pushing. Even younger women, without the elderly thing going on, get stuck in this way occasionally (yes, girls, admit it). I started feeling ridiculously claustrophobic and a little panicky until inch by inch I was able to get it off, through my muffled "just fine" to the sales lady who chirped, "Is everything going okay?"

Who needs new clothes anyway?

That dress was only $11.00, marked down from $68. There was no way I was going to have it ripped off me with the Jaws of Life--not that I bought it, but someone else can still get a deal. That was my good deed for the day for some lucky gal needing a lovely dress she might (hopefully) be able to maneuver out of without any damage.